Random Thoughts On England

Alright, I’ve spent two weeks in England a week ago or so. We traveled to the UK by boat (mostly at night). The first day, when we arrived there, we started with a breakfast of sausages, bacon, toast and eggs. Sweeeet (well, not really; sweet I mean. OK, it’s sweet, but not taste-ish sweet. You know, sweet-and-sour sweet. Without the sour.) We stayed in three caravans on three different places in the east and south-east of England (the last one only about 60 miles from London). The caravan parks were a experience on their own. Never had I seen such big caravan parks. I mean, the first one (the biggest one) had over 1300 caravans on it, it was like a country on its own. It had a super market; swiming pool; entertainment halls (“Fun World”); fish and chips joint; and was divided into villages and streets. You needed a map to find you caravan. The second and third were a bit smaller, but still quite big. The landscapes are great, very much like we had seen in English detectives such as Morse, Frost, Midsummer Murders and so on.

We had a great time. The weather was good (it only rained once or twice). We also visited Cambridge and it’s quite amazing to see what the average UK university looks like (wink). Ours look a tad different, so to speak. I found it interesting to know that King’s College (probably the most impressive of all colleges there) was originally built for 70 children coming from poor families. Given that it costs 1500 pounds a day to keep the college running, it’s not odd to think that the current students may have to be a bit more fortunate than those in the beginning.

That science in the UK has come as far as it has, is a miracle to me, though. I mean, using measurements like feet, yards, miles, stone, acres; come on! A yard is 3 feet. A mile is 1760 yards, which is 5280 feet. Who made this up? The different measurements simply do not translate into one another. OK, sure, we had this kind of measures aswell in the Netherlands, but we saw that they didn’t work and dropped them. The Romans never mastered mathematics because of their numbering system (I, II, III, IV, …); when will the English realize they may have gotten in wrong? And the Americans too, for that matter.

English television: Great. Now we’re back in the Netherlands we still watch “Waking the Dead” at Sundays and Mondays on BBC 1. Another great series is “My Hero”:http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/guide/articles/m/myhero_66602550.shtml, which is so amazingly absurd that you can only laugh at it. And it’s also fun to see how ITV1 (a commercial station) tries to make the most dull things seem attractive with programmes with titles like “Extreme Archeology”, what’s next, “Killer Gardens”? We also saw “Face/Off”:http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0119094/. Moral of the story: Never change faces with your worst enemy.

Typical English food: Fish and Chips. Yay, very nice. Particulary when it’s served by a chubby woman with a mustache in a stinky place. Let’s just say a lot of vinegar makes up for a lot.